nilisha- diary

Saturday 16th Jan

As I put on the wig and looked at myself into the mirror, I realized my cheek wrinkles had increased and the dark circles added to it. I no more needed fake Grey hair to look old and gain sympathy. I stuck carefully, the burnt face mask piece and wore my old stinky torn pants to get to my usual beggar look.
I totally enjoy sitting in that corner on brigade road near mota archade.I like to sit there for the trance music and foreign crowd that pass by and give me money because of my skin.
I love amereecans. They are such kind hearted people. They always pay me more than Indians.
I got treated by a very beutifool amreecan couple for dinner who gave me a lot of five star food not realizing my mask was tearing out of my skin as i scratched my face.


Sunday 17th Jan

The sun was bright at my face and traffic sound woke me up today morning. I ran to cross the road before people saw my face.It itched a little near my neck.
There was a red patch and scratching worsened it. I washed my face with water and put the mask again. By the afternoon I couldn't bare the pain on my neck. It itched and I couldn't lie for long on the pavement, so I walked back home. I am guessing this could be just be a small skin allergy and will be fine in a few days.I got my favorite pizza home delivered.I think the delivery boy saw my face with thick kohl,this shoudnt be too bad actually. The rest of the day was spent itching my neck as it started to swell.I walked to the chai kade and sat there staring at the orange street lights away from the rest.People had started to notice me, they gave a second look to my neck as a small lump of my skin had almost started to hang. The pain also increased.I will have to go to the doctor tomorrow. I cant bare this pain anymore.


Monday 18th Jan

I got up at 3 am as my neck boil hurt a lot . I wanted to scratch it but controlled till early morning.
I twisted and turned in my bed but couldnt get sleep. As soon as i fell asleep again the boil burst and pus started to ooze out . A thick yellow semiliquid erupted like lava and covered my vest. i wiped and yelled in pain. I cleaned it for a while and popped pain relief tablet.
The sun was up and I was already tired and hungry. I knew if I put my mask now most people will get scared and sympathies with me. I went out in my vest and to my good luck I saw young boys and girls who got down from their cars and walked by.I had noticed the long hair girl once on the cruise in Thailand and recognized her now. I knew she is wealthy and would be surely carrying some in her purse.
I passed by her , directly staring into her eyes. We stared till we were far. She was scared. i knew that. I had stolen her purse without her notice. I knew i had the art.5000 bucks would be enough for three days pizza party, i think!


Tuesday 19th Jan

Yes i was drunk last night, and today morning i got up on the foot path. My skin itched as i shooed the flies from my face and my wig was lying a little further away with few coins some passer bys blessed me with.
Bhatla Bhai called early after noon and said he needs me some time soon. I was drinking that time again. I almost broke the bottle in my hand in excitement. I have tied cloth in my right hand to stop the blood flow. I think it should be okay soon.
I walked to my pet place in brigade road, sat near mota archade and heard world space trance music as i was high and stared continuously at the foreign girls. Theirs legs are long.
I want some foreign girl. I have been dreaming of her since then.


Wednesday 20th Jan

The lump of flesh on my neck is becoming better. I had a long bath today and cleaned myself up. I feel good although i wasnt in my usual beggar look. As i walked the streets i smelt jalebis and turned away from it.
You know Purnima loved jalebis.I loved it too. We met at the jalebi stall only. I will kill her rapists one day . yes i will.
I took a bus to the railway station to go and eat in the dhabas outside.I love the food there. while putting samosa in my mouth i saw a woman in the train. Her beautiful hand was outside the window and she had a thick gold bangle on it.
Considering my art and in fond memories of Purnima I lured the bangle. The train had started to move slowly. I was walking around the area to look casual. As the train took speed I slit her hand and jumped on the railway track. I threw the hand and ran with the bangle as fast as i could. People around were more shocked and confused how to react before taking any action which is why i managed to escape.y
I threw the black suit and wig in the garbage on my way home. I have the gold bangle.



Thursday 21st jan

So enjoyment began after i got cash in return of the bangle. I have been drinking only old monk since morning and bought pizza also. Some pieces were also lying near my bed, i relished those.
In the afternoon i walked to the lake and saw Basanthi sitting on a bench alone and smoking. She got excited seeing me and getting to know i had old monk and pizza she followed me home.
I loved bathing with her in the old monk pool. Even though her legs are not as long as the foreign girls she made me happy for the rest of the evening. We walked drunk outside the house and made out until the neighbors came and beat us up.
I dont really remember much of that but i have blue black patches all over my body.I also dont know where Basanthi went.




Friday 22nd Jan

Bhatla bhai called up early morning just to break my sleep. I was warned earlier not to do public activities and get noticed, but bhai got to know about the past two days.He has called me tomorrow, am waiting.
I chilled at my usual place starring at foreign girls and collecting coins all day.i feel nostalgic. My cloths stink badly and repel Indian girls I think. May be Purnima and Basanthi also went away because of this.
I drank old monk and heard trance and passed out on the pavement seeing amreecans.